Thank you to everyone that gave me your advice. It truely was so helpful. My husband and I have decided that tomorrow we will confront our son about what we know. I have spent a great deal of time researching local NA meetings and local doctors he can call that will help him detox easier. We have no idea how he will react. Just know we have to do it. When we face him with this, we were not going to go in his room and take the pills beforehand because everything I've read says that it could be dangerous, physicallly, for him to stop cold turkey. I would love to have some input about this. Our plan is to confront him about what we know and give him the info I have about everything and tell him that he either does the things we're asking, or he needs to leave, not just leave, but no contact with us. Please let me know, does anyone think this is the right way or the wrong way to go.
IMO, there is no greater show of love for a child than absolute confrontation when it comes to addiction. Were it me I would take the pills. Withdrawals from opiates is a highly uncomfortable, nauseating, cramping, itching affair. But is seldom fatal. From what you described already hes not deep enough to worry about it. But I'm no Dr. Follow your gut.
Of course be prepared for the worst. Most likely he will tell you he hates you. He will flip the situation to make it your fault. He will look for pity by telling you the 5 words every addict knows " i wish i was dead." He will seek to undermine your moral base by accusing you of having no right to go through his things. He will make himself the victim here.
Post again and let us know how close I am. Stick to your guns , be strong. Eventually God willing he will say the 5 other words every addict knows, " I wish I were alive."
best of luck to all three of you Marie.
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The fundamental delusion of humanity , is to suppose that I am here and you are out there .
Our plan is to confront him about what we know and give him the info I have about everything and tell him that he either does the things we're asking, or he needs to leave, not just leave, but no contact with us. Please let me know, does anyone think this is the right way or the wrong way to go.
I agree with anthony, about taking the pills. It's your house and I'm assuming that he doesn't pay rent. The posession of the pills is illegal. I think it's justified and may put more emphasis on him deciding to go to rehab. It'll take away the "I'll just nod my head till these people shut up and then take my pills" option for him.
If he doesn't decide to get help and moves out, I don't think that I'd cut off all contact. I would tell him to call whenever you like, just don't complain about life or ask for money if you choose to continuing using drugs.
i do not post a lot here, because of my bad language skills and because i am not very deep in the na thing. but i come here when ever i can. and sometimes the postings and the people on this board helped me through difficult situations.
it may sound ridiculous but the thing but the thing that helped me out sometimes was not only the good advice it is more the spirit shared here.
i often read things like my kid is in trouble with law and abusing drugs.
its ok to force your kid to take responsibility for his life.
but dont forget to think about yourself and your own spirit and abusive behavior your kid perhaps adapted from you.
