Nurses and addiction

ernurse · Newbie

Nurses and addiction

ItsAllGolden · Senior Member

I know this may sound weird, but NA teaches us to not give "advice" or lecture anyone or preach anything...we share our own experiences, the strength we have found, and the hope we share and give to one another.

Our lives are all different, yet we share the common bond of being drug addicts that don't want to get high any longer. Getting high makes us miserable. It no longer gives us freedom; it has enslaved us.

My experience? The drugs weren't working, and I didn't know what to do. I tried the medicine, religion, psychiatry routes, and found only temporary relief. I found Narcotics Anonymous, and found a program that teaches about spiritual principles, how to use them in every day life, while sharing the pain of life with others just like me, who have the same struggles with addiction and recovery.

So...my advice? Go to www.na.org and find a meeting near you. Get there as often as humanly possible, every day if you can. Listen and you'll learn what to do. Grab some free pamphlets, buy a book or two even.

I have a friend that says he spent 10,000 dollars on rehab in order to find NA for free.

ps ~ I know a lot of nurses in recovery, so don't feel alone due to your profession. There are addicts in all walks of life.

-- Edited by ItsAllGolden at 23:09, 2008-11-01

dan h · Senior Member

Welcome, enurse, and thanks Goldie for your "advice." Great suggestions, all.
In NA, enurse, no one "tells" us what to do and no one is going to make us do anything we do not choose to do. We follow this way of life by example rather than by direction. However, "when asked," we do have helpful experience and useful suggestions to offer. ItsAllGolden has outlined a few good ones, and there are many more to be found at face to face NA meetings.
There is no shame in being an addict, providied we accept our dilemma honestly and take positive action. Addiction is an equal opportunity disease afflicting a cross section of society. Everyone here is equal and has paid the price of membership with their pain. You are now among a very special group of people who share a common bond of addiction and recovery, and much like survivors of a plane crash or other catastrophe, we understand each other as no one else can. Please continue to come here to find the relief from addiction that you seek and love and support from others who have also NA to be the answer to their problem.
One thing I might offer at this point is this: Forget about being "normal" ever again. Addiction is a disease, progressive, incurable, and fatal if left untreated. We begin to treat our disease by not using a day at a time, and using the 12 steps as a progressive program of recovery. Like a pickle which will never be a cucumber again, we ARE addicts, we will always BE addicts. Today, we are RECOVERING addicts. We are not responsible for our disease, but we ARE responsible for our recovery.

Welcome home.

Peace be with you.

-- Edited by dan h at 01:34, 2008-11-02

justtina · Member

ernurse i am so glad you came to themeeting last night. since i came clean last week you are the 2nd nurse besides me ive talked to who suffers from the same hell of addicition
unfirtunatley, i do not have a computer as i lost that to my addicition last time i tried to come clean. now i lost my job, my license in one state, my boyfirned, custody of my 4 year old-and am staying temporarily at my 77 yr old mothers trying to rebuild myself, and the home i just moved into is possibly my next loss. i believe that "things happen for a reason" and if i didnt almost get caught and lose my job i would dtill be using. perhaps a blessing in diguise.doesnt make it easy. anyway just wanted to say thank you for coming here and sharing. you are helping another person just by your words.

ernurse · Newbie

I do have a great therapist. She has taught me as I said that sometimes when god is closing the door he is opening a window. I have many traumatic events in my life that i continue to try to overcome. i have spent a lot of time letting the situations own me, and still do much of the time. i am trying very hard to learn the pattern of taking ownership and not letting it all drag me down. i have used to try to cope or even forget all that has happened. as we both know being a nurse puts us very close to our escape. i didn't get caught and i haven't lost everything, in fact god has been good to me. i hate my addiction though and have replaced one for another now for nearly two years. i stepped forward and asked for help, as all of the losses you have experienced were well on their way to becoming a reality. i have not ever attended an na meeting, but it has been suggested. i start with an a and d counselor and really don't know what to expect. the unknown is very scary to me. i have very little trust in anyone. i love everything i have and yet self sabotage every change i get all for the small amount of time that i "feel better". i hope that being here will bring me some of the peace and comfort i am seeking.

BigV · Senior Member

First thing I would suggest is get the NA book and start reading it describes in detail what you express here with us and though I am a lowly painter I can totally relate to your feelings I am an addict too and thats what binds us together.

When I came to NA little over 2 years ago something I read in the book that hit me like a frying pan to the face was We use over our feelings, something to that effect, I knew right then I needed to read and understand more about what was going on inside of me and what I could do about what I was doing to myself with those feelings and how I could make some changes.

The first thing i wanted was to stop using then get my life in order but there was a lot to face and get honest with .

Meetings are where we hear how others are staying clean and how to apply the program to our lives, this is an important piece of the program and a tool, we get to meet others who are on our own journey in recovery and we get clean , meet others who need help and become a tool ourselves so we denfinetly need all the people we can get to keep this life saving thing going.

Welcome ernurse

justtina · Member

ernurse i am still struggling with the sense behind all this but one thing i keep telling myself is that i alone have he control over whether or not to ever use again and looking at all that has been stolen from me from those fucking pills just isnt worth going through anymore so though i am only a week clean i am feeling myself come back an eeny teeny bit at a time but i'm in there somewhere do not give up on yourself you were/are smart enough to make it through the hell of nursign school so we arent dummies we are good smart people w/alot to offer this life lets get on with it find strength wherever we have to and keep in touch-peace

ernurse · Newbie

I once said that after I received my nursing license that no one could take that from me. This is so untrue, I think that little bit alone or at least I'm praying is what I'm holding onto right now. Keep your chin up and focus on the positive. You find people all over the place, some just take one look and walk away in disgust and then there are others that are willing to stick it out. One day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time. Sometimes for me, it's just one thought at a time.

DeanC · Guru

Hi Annie, welcome to the board. I started getting serious about addressing my substance abuse problems about 22 years ago. I was attending AA meetings for 2 years pretty regularly and couldn't get more than 2 months sober before relapsing. I couldn't understand why this kept happening. One night, while walking into my AA club for an 8:30 meeting, I walked into a meeting late and thought it was AA. After a couple of minutes I realized the it wasn't. Turns out it was a Codendents anonymous meeting. I had been meaning to check one out but hadn't gotten around to it. Well long story short, it was exactly what I needed as the Coda issues, that I was experiencing, were keeping my from getting clean and sober. There were a lot triggers there.

The reason that I'm mentioning this is that Nursing is the number 1 chosen profession of codependents, and most substance abusers are condependents. And depression is very common amongst us as we internalize
resentments, usually from the disappointments surrounding us helping others. If you're not already acquainted with this program, check it out. http://www.codependents.org/foundation-docs-patterns.php

Dean

-- Edited by DeanC at 20:36, 2008-11-02

viablex1 · Veteran Member

First of all welcome. NA saved my career.

My experience is, I volunteered for the impairment group in my state so I could be monitored and not ever get the State board involved. I surrendered and everything worked out and I stayed clean through the work I did in NA. Just my 2 cents. You do not want to get the State Board involved and have something in the national data bank. IPN is not that bad

Viablex1

-- Edited by viablex1 at 14:52, 2008-11-03

peachz · Veteran Member

Your family needs you to stay clean! You will be introduced to the 12 steps in treament. Rehabilate means to get you back to good health. We are sick people trying to get better. Fear = Face everything and recover or F--- everything and run. Saying your family needs you and that you just started a new job is justification to continue on a destructive path. If you reached out to us today you realize that drugs have become a major problem and we are here to help you do something about it. Excuses are only for the unwilling .

imikens · Senior Member

I am an RN as well. I worked for, still work for, a hospice organization. Found out hospice is one of the biggest areas for nurses using and diverting opiates.

I did not divert. I had my own. Took Percocet and then Vicodin after shoulder surgery, needed rotator cuff repairs on both shoulders, for some time. Due to the nature of the injury, physical therapy run up to "failed" therapy so insurance authorized surgery, rehab first shoulder, same process for the second shoulder, I was on opiates daily for many many months. I stopped them. Had to use some suboxone to get through a few days of detox, it was only a few, and did it all by self reporting to my employer per policy and did nothing "wrong". Never hurt a patient. Never diverted drugs. Did everything correctly and am a good hospice nurse. Always have great reviews, patient families loved my care, etc.

However due to the nature of drugs, nurses and hospice, the employee assistance program for my employer IS the State Nursing Board's program. I self reported to the state board and again am in no trouble BUT my nursing license is subject to my following all the rules for all nurses, those who have hurt patients-diverted drugs-iv drug use-etc., even though my use was quite different in terms of the logistics of it if you will.

I am not in denial as I did cross the line with the opiates and was addicted. I have many addictive mindset processes, point of view, etc., and am glad I am in recovery and I need to be in recovery. But I will be in the nursing monitoring program for 3 years, about 2 1/2 now, and check daily to see if I need to provide a specimen. It seems too much for both my "crime" and my addiction. But it is what it is and I will do what is required.

I can no longer be alone with narcotics. So I can't work in patient's homes, where I worked before, until I complete the full 3 years. I have to have some other RN around. Its a pain but it is what it is.

Because I did self report, followed the rules, I was able to use FMLA and short term disability which was nice. But still I would have rather kept my job as an in home nurse case manager.

If I do not comply with the program my nursing license is gone. So IF I want to work as a nurse its not a matter of going to recovery meetings, counselors, nurse support groups, etc., because I agree that its good to go. I do agree its good to go. But it doesn't matter if I think its a good idea or not. I go basically cause I want to have a job.

My advice to you is work your program. Beyond that as others have said your recovery is totally about you.

imikens · Senior Member

"You do not want to get the State Board involved and have something in the national data bank. IPN is not that bad."

I'm not sure about IPN or what other states do but in my state the program is self contained and no record of it after you complete it successfully.

nurse_kels · Newbie

Hello
I too am a RN I worked at a level 2 trauma center for a few years, thats when I began using. I have been a nurse for 11 yrs and just recently came out. I didn't get caught really I just decided enough is enough. What I had to do was attend an outpatient 8 week AODA group it was 3 days a week for 3 hour sessions. I loved it. Now I am required by the state to attend group twice monthly with my counsler. I also submit random urine tests. Hope that helps a little. If not let me know if I can help anymore.
nurse_kels

Fauble_90 · Newbie

Addiction to anything is really not a good thing. So one needs to come out of it as early as possible. My friend was also an opiate addict and use to take daily heavy doze. So recommend him to visit...(HOTLINK REMOVED) center to take treatment from there. With treatment he was out of it within 2 months. Happy to see great improvement in him.

....ADVERTISEMENT HOTLINK REMOVED by Mikah

-- Edited by mikah on Tuesday 13th of June 2017 01:52:08 PM

mikah · Senior Member

Fauble_90 wrote:
Addiction to anything is really not a good thing. So one needs to come out of it as early as possible. My friend was also an opiate addict and use to take daily heavy doze. So recommend him to visit (HOTLINK REMOVED) center to take treatment from there. With treatment he was out of it within 2 months. Happy to see great improvement in him.

Fauble, it seems you aren't familiar with the Traditions of NA..... in particular #'s 4 & 6. Otherwise you might think twice about coming here to advertise and hotlink your 'friends' treatment center.

Traditions.... https://na.org/admin/include/spaw2/uploads/pdf/litfiles/us_english/misc/Twelve%20Traditions.pdf

Thanks tho,, for digging up this thread from 2008,,, it's ironic how the first reply seems to address you so directly

ItsAllGolden wrote:

So...my advice? Go to www.na.org and find a meeting near you. Get there as often as humanly possible, every day if you can. Listen and you'll learn what to do. Grab some free pamphlets, buy a book or two even.

I have a friend that says he spent 10,000 dollars on rehab in order to find NA for free.

-- Edited by ItsAllGolden at 23:09, 2008-11-01

Welcome to the Miracles In Progress Group of Narcotics Anonymous! This is not an official NA site, nor is it endorsed by the NA World Service Office.