I went to an AA meeting tonight and I guess it has got me feeling a little frustrated. I know I always started my using through alcohol and it has always been there, but I felt so out of place. Man, I guess I have been feeling that way though anyway. I dont know! I just want to feel comfortable in my own skin. No matter where I am at or who I am with.
i felt the same in a na meeting i was more than a year ago. after that i haven't been on a meeting until last week.
this week i visited my second aa meeting and this time i felt much more comfertabel. i think because i could focuse more on what is equal than on what is differnet.
one guy shared (i'm afraid i can't regive it in a proper way) something like: face the fear (frustration, or things you are uncomfortable with) makes you feel more comfortabel in your own skin step by step.
Hey Bud believer,, know that u have a friend in the other side of the globe. my name is Raman and I am an addict. My phone number is 91-9845181485,,, call me please if you want to. The feeling of exitement when someone new calls me is intense. If u are in the US then we ae about 12 hours apart,,i am 12 hours ahead of you. Let not any shyness stop- u from calling me if you want to. I have always been amazed how well tis works,,one addict sharing with another !!! God Bless you in your recovery !
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Hello Joy, and Welcome. Thanks for your post. I know it may not seem like it right now, but you are poised to make one of the greatest changes that is possible in life. You are about to experience what they call living two lives in one lifetime. It is a fundamental transformation that takes place when an addict stops using AND works the steps. Please don't give up or stop in the middle of the process. All the confusion, doubt, insecurity, inadequacy, and pain are just a part of the process. The pay-off is worth it. It takes great courage to finally grow up and BE who you really ARE! Each of us has to do it for ourselves, but we don't have to do it alone, there is plenty of help and our Higher Power is always with us, guiding us, strengthening us. We can't change everything at once, but we can change SOMETHING at once. Then we change something else, and something else...pretty soon we hardly recognize ourselves. Be encouraged, you are not alone! Good Luck, and keep growing. Dan H.
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"With a sweet tongue of kindness, you can drag an elephant by a hair." ~Persian Proverb
I'm sorry but I'm not sure what you are trying to get across. Are you 104 days clean and have been in a program for some time and are now feeling this way? I'm confused on the timing of this for you. Sorry.
I'm asking as a newbie as well. I am trying to imagine how it goes for the long term. When the first part of the getting clean crisis/urgency has passed and you are in a group for a long period of time. It seems to me that you can get into a stuck process where you are no longer the same addict you were. Still an addict but different. If you've been in the same group for a long time and folks remember the addict your were and can't let you you be the different addict you have become, a clean addict, I can see how you could feel very uncomfortable in your own skin. You aren't in denial, but you have grown and are different.
It takes time guys gals it takes work and it takes staying clean and working the program and getting through the steps and meetings and sharing and dumping and ACCEPTING just exactly who we are right now, today.
We're just humans imperfect we're not saints we all have assets as well as defects, as long as your trying give youreself a pat on the back thats how I started liking myself I would say HEY I deserve a pat on the back for that so PAT PAT PAT literally reach around and pat my own damn back LOL it sounds silly but thats what i needed to do for me.
I also see that little boy that I destroyed, little vini * ahhhhhhh * he was a real cute kid and quite innocent at one time then things went very wrong in his life so now i look after him and try to take care of him becuase he likes to go play in the dirt and mud and dredge for gold HEH HEH.....
