The Meeting Room, Server, Folder, Program .... AAAaaarrrrrrgggggg!!!!!

Sue G · Member

The Meeting Room, Server, Folder, Program .... AAAaaarrrrrrgggggg!!!!!

DeanC · Guru

Hi Sue,

I didn't have time to read your whole post. the main reason people can't connect with the chat room is that they lack a "Java" program (not likely on newer computers) or their "Java" program is turned off. You can down load free Java programs, just google java for whatever kind of computer that you have (PC or Mac) hope this helps.

Dean

mrwinkie · Senior Member

hey sue , what a cowinkydink im anthony and im an addict too. there seems to be a ton of them here , are you gettig the pop-up at the chat page ? are you choosing to run it ? is there anyone in the room at the time your there ? the first time i got in it was 12 noon..meetings are at 10 so i just figured my puter was broke ? hey im an addict not a techie . its nice to meet ya, keep coming back . post more i like laughing .

Blithe Spirit · Senior Member

Hey Sue! I'm not much for the chat room myself - the meetings are too late for me and when I've visited in between, not much is happening - BUT I wanted to jump in to say that your post made me laugh! (Not AT you, but WITH you.)

Thanks for the share. I hope you get it figured out. I also hope you keep posting!

NA hugs

Sue G · Member

Hello Dean.

Nice to make your aquaintance ...

As for your not having had time to read through my whole rant ..

.. oops ... did I say rant

? Post ... I meant to say post biggrin

!!

It's no biggy, it certainly didn't/doesn't contain any earth shattering revelations or anything like that. Just little old me ... well alright .... honesty .... at that point in time I suppose I was a little closer to

totally beant out of proportion me ...

... regardless, it was just me, blowing steam, and pretty much just working to get myself back into a bit of sanity before leaving the site altogeather.

I do appreciate though, that you got as far as you did in reading it, and that you then took the time to respond!! Cool. And thanks aww

. I have NO idea what was happening over the last few days, why I couldn't get things happening?? Earlier tonight though, I deleted my Java, as well as that mRIC thingy - ??? I might have jiggered that name up there *blush* .... and that word, 'thingy', is a VERY well repected technical term up here in Canada ... to say nothing of jiggered .... just a little FYI, in case perhaps your unfamiliar .... just working to keep you in the loop

. Once everything was cleared off my hardrive, I went ahead and redownloaded Java ... and what do you know? Success

!!

Now, I'm working dilegently here not to shoot off into a rave, which I would be fully qualified to do, by the way, working to not rave as to how I had already done just that ... twice

!! All is well now though ... well, at least all is well for now, I'm in!!!! YEAH

!!!

I feel myself treading once again into novel length posting territory, so ... I'd better pull in the reins now

and get going. Again, once more, thanks for the input ...

Here's to my putting the most positive of thoughts towards you having yourself an ABSOLUTELY awsome, recovery driven day!!!

Yours in recovery,
Sue G. An addict in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada.
Just Cillaxin' up here now ....

..... lol

Sue G · Member

Hi Anthony.  Nice to meet you. (this is the sorriest looking smiley face EVER ... well, then there IS that sad assed winking little smiley they have on here ... Lord it's BAD ... sheesh!!)

I wanted to say thanks for taking the time out to make me feel welcome, muchly appreciated!! The whole 'crazy' with trying to get into the chat room has been resolved ... THANK GOD!!! I actually tried to go to the meeting there last night, I got in okay and everything, but then there was a .... dare I say ... a 'riot' ... ? ... yea, I dare ... that's sure what it felt/looked a little like. Well, not that I've ever felt or seen a riot ... Oh!! ... Sorry, I digress big time ... *blush* ...

   There was a gang of ... .....teens I'm thinking they were, but who knows? I sure as heck wasn't up to going out to check it out, that was a big NEGATIVE to that suggestion! My death wish loving, not to mention a bit on the 'not so up there' in the rational thinking department, neighbor was all about, "Come on! If we go out, and we go down to ... we'll be able to see if they are really shooting, or if it's the cops doing something else .."
Now. I ask you. Would YOU leave the relative safty of your home to duck, and to dodge, to get a CLOSER vantage point in order to view the crazies of the world in action!! "Gee ... if we get really lucky, maybe we can get caught up in the middle of something REALLY nuts!! Won't THAT be exciting ... well, if we live of course ..."

Now .... I might be short a few cells in the old brain box, but there's still a spark or two firing off with a fairly smooth regularity now and then .. .. there is AT LEAST enough power to have a sense of preservation of life. ESPECIALLY my own , thank you very much!

   Okay ... I'll admit it ... I might have a little work left to do as far as the whole self-centered thing goes .. .. and I'll get to it ... really I will. Just as soon as I make sure MY ass is safe and secure!!!

   I suppose it would be good if I told you what the heck I'm talking about eh? Or, I suppose I could just let you fill in your own details ... make it more interesting, or even boring if you like. OMG! What am I going on about!?? Lol ... I've just spent fivr minutes telling a story that, by the way, still      remains untold!

Omg ... You'll have to excuse my babble Anthony ... truth be told .. I am REALLY beat. I haven't been sleeping all that well recently, and I believe I may be feeling, and sounding, a little 'punch drunk' here ... ya' think?

   Let's see if I can just get to the point here (HA!! *right* THAT will be the day!!!) Anyway .. when I signed in to the chat last night ... early, so I'd have time to screw the actual 'getting into' the room all up, and still maybe be able to make the meeting time . I was just saying hello and such when I heard this strange sound ... not really loud, but distinguisable for what it was ... I'll save that part ... you will NOT believe it ... and most certainly strange ...disbelievable really .... given where I live! So, I hear this sound, think 'Get outta' here, that can't be ..." Oh! I should tell you that I live in a city. It isn't a large city, it's large enough I suppose ... I'd tell you how many people live here but .... well, I have no idea .. so, that's out.

   There are actually three cities all within I guess ... I don't know, .. maybe fifteen, twenty minutes of each other ... two of them, mine and the one accross the harbour, were imalgamated a few years back. Have you heard of this? It's basically a nice way to say "We, the bigger, richer city, are going to now suck you into helping us to pay off all the debt we created while spending hoards of cash on 'our' side of the harbour. Oh yes, you also no longer can refer to where you live as the city of ... because we have taken our city name and changed it to 'The Greater City Of ... which will include you, so the name is just a redundance ..."

   "Smile now ... it'll only hurt for a second ..." I say, BAH!! Grrrrr .... What a crock!!

LMAO!!  I just realized that I am venting about a city you know nothing about, and most likely care even less! Never mind THAT, but I STILL didn't get to the freakin' reason I didn't get the meeting in!!!! SHEESH!!!

   Well, my new friend, you'll LOVE this part, I have to go ... lmao!! ...sometimes even I can't believe the stuff I do!! Sorry about that. I really do have to motor though, my drive will be here in mear moments and I, of course ... as usual .. *sigh* .. am not even close to being ready!!

   I'll tell the rest some other time ... lol .. I can't believe I have the nerve to post this drival ... but, yes indeedy! I do, I do, I do .... lol ...

Big, warm, fuzzy, NA Hugz to you ...
Take care .. and again, thanks for dropping a few lines ..
Sue G. An addict in Nova Scotia, Canada

BigV · Senior Member

Welcome Sue

Sue G · Member

Hi .... hmmmm .... confused

.... I'm wondering ... shall I address you as 'Big', or maybe 'V' is better? Or perhaps you prefer to be addressed in the way it is written? Whichever way, you'll have to let me know please ... Thanks smile

So ...

... Pleased to meet you, and thanks so much for the welcome!! I've been working my way around the site a little bit. You may have noticed ....

... that in here, I'm a bit of a gabber biggrin

.

I've been trying to reply to the folks who responded to my ranting the other night, but with my ever so precious gift of ADHD, I tend to wonder off to Lord only knows where when I get going .... it's sometimes, .... Okay! ... it's most times then, that I find it difficult to type anywhere near as fast as the topics, sentences, thoughts, questions, etc. are flying through this head of mine!! I just looked back at what I've written in here so far a few minutes ago, and .... !! .... *sheesh* .... last night was a winner!! weirdface

Sorry about that Anthony! smile

I notice that it says 'Senoir Member' under your name, so I'm thinking that maybe you can .... well, I was going to say "tell me what's happening, or what has happened", but I'm hesitant because ... yet again, I'm insecure ..... mostly because of it's propriety, or lack of .... you know, the little voice in your head that says things like; don't ask, don't tell, be quite, don't make a specticle, your too loud, your too soft, your not talking enough .... all of THAT, you are familiar ... aren't you confused

? I don't want to pry, and I'm really not into 'gossip' - trust me on THAT one!!

I create, and have created, enough crazy all on my own, to be sure!! I certainly don't need to pick up someone else's stuff, or worse yet, cause it for them!! I've learned the lesson of not throwing stones long ago. I didn't even have to beat my head on the walls of the NA rooms for that one biggrin

, it was already`in me, already a part of me ..... but then that's a whole story on it's own ..

..

.

For whatever reasons, to me it is beyond comprehention how we judge each other! How we put each other in such jepordy! And yes, truth be told, how we've actually killed one another along the way blankstare

. How we could, or can, even for a minute ...... oops ...

... My God .... I actually lost my mind for a minute there!! Right here, in front of you and everything!!

I forgot for a second (Can you imagine!) I forgot for a second there about 'The Disease'!! Of course I know 'why' we do what we do .... well, most times anyway aww

.... and 'how' we can possibly justify the actions .... *eyes rolling* .... because we're really experts at looking outside aren't we? Where I come from it's tantimount to survival, this total inability to look inside first, never mind if ever at all!   This inability to remember 'what' and/or 'who' I am. To acknowledge my own shortcomings, my own human-ness, and God forbid, own the things I have done, caused, plotted, kept quite, etc. I mean, after all, it plays much more naturally for me to focus on YOU, and all YOUR warts and such. Plus, I get the added bonus of blindly bumping along in my life, continuing to bump (or smash) into the same old walls, over and over again!!

   I should probably write a little disclaimer for myself here as well, I do not hold myself in condemnation for having acted out on my ..... shortcomings ...... my .... character defects, at least not for the times when I knew no different. Nor do I do that to others. And for me, there MOST definately was that time, that VERY, very long time, when I had SO little understanding!! In hindsight ... it makes clear to me the struggle, or passion that I've seen in folks have when they share. When they talk of the desire, of the please God wish, that they could give away what they had come to find in thier lives. In hindsight we can clearly see what we did not know, we can see that we thought this and that, we functioned on meetings and an obsessive ....whatever .... but we did not grow. We did not understand, or feel, the profound change in our very nature .... until we actually did the work. Until we worked the Steps of this program, we spout all sorts of new knowledge ... and that IS real as well .... but ..... the Steps. The Steps have the Power to set us free. The Steps are our solution. We experience profound and life ultering realizations. We experience a profound awakening of the spirit that did not even know that it slept. The answers are in the Steps for certain, without doubt .... but .... we can not give each other our answers. We must all make the journey of our own. The absolutly greatest news about that horrible sounding truth is that we NEVER have to do it alone. Never again do we have to tremble in the insecurities of.....

   OMG!!! .... weirdface

..... I've gone and done it yet AGAIN!!

Here it is, many paragraphs later .... and I have to leave the house very shortly .. hmm

.. and I never DID ask what I had intended to when I went off on my little tangent blankstare

!!!

   Well, I suppose ..... nothing without reason and purpose, right?

   I did actually observe some growth in myself, in my thinking, as I wrote. Sometimes it isn't so easy to see that the journey does indeed continue when the willingness to grow and change is brought to the table. I continue to work with my sponsor, to work the Twelve Steps of NA, to study the Twelve Traditions and work to apply them in all areas of my life .... by the Grace of a loving, carring Higher Power .... I actually don't think that I'm all that bad today ... aww

... I also don't think that I'm all that good either wink

so ... I'll take that as a good sign that this program is working for me in my life, just as I continue to work for it.

May the Power that loves and guides lead you to whatever it is you need most in your life today ..... May that same Power be there to help you see and understand that It has done just that .....

BIG NA HUGZ TO YOU ALL!!

Yours in Recovery,
Sue G. An addict in Nova Scotia, Canada

BigV · Senior Member

by the Grace of a loving, carring Higher Power .... I actually don't think that I'm all that bad today ... ... I also don't think that I'm all that good either so ... I'll take that as a good sign that this program is working for me in my life, just as I continue to work for it.

Thats kinda how I look at this too Sue I don't as often have those thoughts of being a bad person or just feeling bad inside, seldom and fare between they are now days.

You can call me Vini, I used to be a lot bigger but have had to give up my weight lifting almost all together due to injurys and old age, i'm still pretty good in size just not a lineman anymore aww

I was with a guy who had ADD a few weekends ago we were gold prospecting, BOY I WISH I HAD THAT ENERGY at 50 he was non stop I have a hard time geting half way threw my days without needing a nap bleh

Ok have to git moving still work to do this evening glad to have you with us Sue keep sharing with us.

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