In analysis, you are confronted by your qualities and cannot disown them, though you may try to. We aren't all in formal analysis, but the Twelve Step program does introduce us to the personal inventory. In this exercise of introspection, we come to know ourselves. We often don't like who we see, but until we have acknowledged it, we are unable to change the specifics of our behavior.
Blaming other people and the "unlucky" circumstances of our lives for all our troubles is deeply rooted in who we are. But coming to believe that accepting full responsibility for ourselves will empower us, even when we are guilty of wrongdoing, is a major step forward.
Looking squarely at ourselves and owning all of who we are may not make us proud, but it does make us honest and humble. We have to be both, first, if we ever hope to forge the qualities that will make us proud.
* Wisdom from my inbox, passing it on...
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
THAT was a huge hurdle for me owning who I am and being ok with it and changing what needed changing. At first it seemed overwhelming but all I was looking at were my defects, once I looked at both sides I saw more balance and it made things easier.
Here's one more I received this morning... simple yet powerful reflection
"Forgiveness is the key to action and freedom."
When we refuse to forgive ourselves, we think we are being very noble for not letting ourselves off the hook. What we're really doing, however, is setting ourselves up to use again.
We're not accepting the fact that we are powerless over our addiction. It changed us into people who did not act according to our values. We did things that hurt others. If we accept our powerlessness, we are saying that addiction controlled us, and not the other way around. We did not choose this disease and, therefore, must forgive ourselves for getting a human disease called addiction. It doesn't mean our behavior was okay, it means we no longer hold a grudge against ourselves.
Today let me forgive myself.
-- Edited by Tahir at 03:13, 2008-04-16
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
I like what you said about the luck thing, there are ways to percieve that we are unlucky and some people are lucky.
I heard from my Brother (very successful man) once, there is good luck, bad luck, dumb luck etc. Then there is the really lucky person that gets a good nights sleep, wakes up early, prays to his higher power, plans his day and works hard at the plans in a positive manner and does this daily. Everyone will say this man is lucky. Hope that makes sense.
kenh
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God is the only one you can depend on in recovery.
