I just try to stay in the moment LOL if I can make it threw the day without screwing it all up I'm doing good.
I do comitt to certain things by taking responsibilty for my life just for today and everything that comes at me and even my actions.
So most of the time my day is one moment at a time one thing at a time, taking the next step carefully and always inventory taking. I feel like i'm walking a tight rope at times but I'm trying to make changes especially with how I react to life.
Prayer and meditation is my rule, thats what guides me most of my day and what I hope for is each day takes me into the next week and the next month and year clean, as I walk this journey my life will take a path of goodness, there won't be huge failures and let downs.
I don't make resolutions, I more often turn over my will and life and do the footwork and if I fall short then I fell short and admitt I need help bigger then me which comes from my higher power. I dont get more then I can handle and I know what I can handle by meditating and only take on what i can do.
how do you interpret change? Change within myself and my life happens so gradually that I usually don't notice it until later. It's more like a slow evolution.
Of course there are things that I want in my life and in my self, but I try really hard to keep my focus on my path today: Living according to my spiritual principles and doing the next right thing.
I do the footwork needed to achieve my hopes/wants/goals. I do not force or manipulate. Then I turn over the results and go on with life. Sometimes I get what I want/need/hope for, and other times I most definitly do not.
how do you commit? without setting yourself up...?
I got stuck in the quote section of that last post, so I'll try to finish here...
how do you commit? without setting yourself up...?
I don't commit to anything until I'm ready. There's no point. I find that I just can't make myself do anything until I'm ready to do it. I've long stopped fighting myself. It's so much healthier for me to just say I'm not ready rather than try to force myself and fail. I am much too rebellious to be forced in to anything!
For the same reason, I stopped believing in procrastination. I don't put off doing something because of procrastination or laziness. I don't do it because I'm not ready, because I don't want to. Plain and simple.
Usually, I don't believe in or make new year resolutions, but there are always thoughts centering around the year gone by at the end of december, like about the areas where I was able to do well and grow in the last one year - marriage, work, family commitments, NA service etc.
And then there are those areas where I did not particularly do well at all or becoming complacent about like - health, finances, regular contact with Sponsor etc.
I take an inventory similar to the one in our IP Living The Program, identify what I did in the last one year that I regret, that I would like to commit to in the coming year, and what I did in the last one year that gave me peace, contentment and joy so that I continue practising those things in the coming year too...
I don't set benchmarks or targets as such. I have always looked at my recovery as a half-filled cup than seeing it as a half-empty one, something that my counselor thought me at the rehab some 4 years back... I learnt a lot from her in this context which I make use of today in my recovery like not getting obsessed with black-and-white thought pattern where it's everything or nothing on a daily basis... "progress not perfection" as our NA literature says made a strong impact in my recovery.
I'm grateful today that I'm able to recognize my strengths, ability and limitations with the help of the program and live accordingly. To work towards a more healthy balance between all areas of my life, and between my individual needs in terms of time, energy, money and interests and the needs of others. I've come to understand that scattering my resources in all directions aimlessly in a cloud of zeal and enthusiasm is not healthy and effective in the long run at all. I've learnt to define and focus, taking care in adding to my activities, responsibilities and commitments, one at a time, to an extent that I can possibly cope with without getting burnt out or feeling stressed. EASY DOES IT as our program says.
Most importantly, I commit to something where my mind and heart is, I commit because I want to, not because I SHOULD or MUST. This way, I experience fulfilment, passion, freedom and gratitude to whatever I commit to. Thanks again to the NA program and to my loving, caring and compassionate Higher Power that this program has rewarded me with.
My first Sponsor has said many a times that if one needs to fulfill his/her desires, they must be expressed in open first, that doing so is the first step forward, to let our Higher Power know what we want, that we are willing to commit, as an affirmation. So here I express it in open
I seek to be in more regular contact with my Sponsor this year and go through the process of step work with him again. I seek to take more care of my health through regular exercise, medication, healthy diet and proper rest. I intend to continue seeking the wisdom and say STOP and NO if something is beyond me. I intend to continue to serve my homegroup with the same intensity and passion that I do over the last few years. I seek to stay away from shopping compulsivity and overeating... ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!
MAY ALL YOUR DESIRES BE FULFILLED MY FAMILY OF KINDRED MIP SPIRITS
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
i like living in the open question,, this dosnt ean i don have a plan or goal,, i not the recluse, aimless wanderer anymore,, important thing is to plan,,, think out and do the process,, and let outcomes happen naturall as a result of the planning and hard work,,do your best and then leave the rest to God they said once to me,,,it works. for me an aspect of adiction is trying to fix outcomes,,thereby leaving the process to chance,default,wishful thinking etc. I know that Gods will can happen only if i try to live my dreams,,faith without works is dead !! "addicts have sought the fruits without the labour" the fear of failure and fear of success stopped me from even thinking of tommorow !!! yesterday is but a dream and tommorow is only a vision,, but today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tommorow a vision of hope,, look well therefore to this day !!! translation of an old Inidan proverb !!! I believe that any money ,property or prestige issue that will not divert me from recovery is ok,,, I had to face an evetuality recently,,, i wear her ring as a token of commitment,, I have faith that my beloved will visit me in summer,,, were both talking about that event each day on phone,sms,internet,,its a commitment. I love that !!it keeps me focussed,,, and many gifts i have in reovery are a result of fearless commitment my many studies that took me back to college and got me many titles my marriage that left me divorced but luck to ge custody of a beautiful baby girl whose mother deserted us when my baby was just 2 odd yers old,,my ex. was sick,, both in body and mind and couldnt cope,,so the forgiveness is easy,,,bt not the tear i shed many times for not being abe to giv baby mine a more wonderful family life !!! my commitment as a single father of a now 12 year old girl is incredible empowering for me,,, thats all the reward I want !!!( tho i beileve that love for my girl is the first instance of love for another human being thats total and without expectations of rewards !!!!) commitment to look afer my aged mother has left me richer in the spirit,,, commitment to service in NA and sponsoring has left me with many beautiful experiences !!! practising billiards has given me many tournament wins,,, exhilirating to say the least !!! my resolutions for the New year are= walk more, Yoga more, and exert more in all areas of my life,, and be ready to face he questions to lifes answers( ye thats right) for each answer i get ive found more questions lingering ! all in all i love living in the open question and this simply means doing my best and leaving the rest to God as I understand,,, in all my life !!! thanks for letting me share some of my everyday madness with yall !!
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
ye and top of the list,,, forever more and for today clean and serene in the NA way Worldwide,, which way for me means one addict sharing recovery with another !! and I pray to God,, Theforcethatkeepsmeclean= "'LET THAT BEGIN WITH ME!!" "MAY I B WILING TO CARE AND SHARE THE NA WAY MORE OF THE TIME THAN I WAS LAST YEAR,,, AND REMEMBER THAT NO MATTER WHAT, IM STILL A RECOVERING ADDICT ,,, AND PRACTICE GODNESS IN ALL OF MY LIFE,,,SO HELP ME GOD !!!""
-- Edited by Raman at 16:32, 2008-01-02
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Thank you guys & gals for the wonderful shares on this topic...
Here's something that I received in my inbox today on the same topic, thought I'd share it with you all...
Reflection for the Day
In the old days, I saw everything in terms of forever. Endless hours were spent rehashing old mistakes. I tried to take comfort in the forlorn hope that tomorrow would be "different." As a result, I lived a fantasy life in which happiness was all but nonexistent. No wonder I rarely smiled and hardly ever laughed aloud. Do I still think in terms of "forever"?
Today I Pray
May I set my goals for the New Year not at the yearlong mark, but one day at a time. My traditional New Year's resolutions have been so grandly stated and so soon broken. Let me not weaken my resolve by stretching it to cover "forever" - or even one long year. May I reapply it firmly each new day. May I learn not to stamp my past mistakes with that indelible word, "forever." Instead, may each single day in each New Year be freshened by my newfound hope.
Today I Will Remember
Happy New Day.
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"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
