something I read this day that I had to share with you all !
"Sharing Grief Opening To Receive Comfort
When we experience something that causes us to feel shock and sadness, we may feel the urge to withdraw from life. It may seem like remaining withdrawn will keep us protected from the world, but during these times it is important to reach out to those trusted and precious people who care about us the most. Even with our best information and reasoning, we never know when someone elses experience or perspective can give us additional information that we need. The universe speaks to us through many channels, and when we open ourselves up to receive its messages, we also receive nurturing care from a loving partner in lifes journey.
Grief is part of the human experience, and sharing our vulnerability is what creates truly close bonds in our relationships. Opening ourselves up in this way gets to the core of our being, past all of our defenses and prejudices. When life seems to crack the outer shell of our world, we are both raw and fresh at the same time. It is then that we discover who is truly willing to walk with us through life. We also see that some of those sent to us may not be the ones we expected to see. Regardless, we learn to trust in the universe, in others, in our own strength and resilience, and in the wisdom of life itself.
Sharing grief allows us to ease our burden by letting someone else help carry it. This helps us process our own inner thoughts and feelings through the filter of a trusted and beloved someone. We may feel guilty or selfish, as if we are unloading on someone who has their own challenges. Although, if we think about it, we know we would do the same for them, and their protests would seem pointless. Remember that not sharing feelings with others denies them the opportunity to feel. We may be the messenger sent by the universe for their benefit, and it is on this mission that we have been sent. By sharing our hopes and fears, joys and pains with another person, we accept the universes gifts of wisdom and loving care.
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
Sat in a meeting the other day and a guy shared for the first time about losing his mother.
He said he was sitting at home one day in the kitchen and her death and grief finally hit , he wept and wept and his wife walked in . It had been months dsince her death and he hadn't grieved in that time.
She just walked up behind him and grabbed hold of him hugging him tight.
Sometimes we have delayed reactions to things because we're so used to stuffing everything down inside and when it finally comes up BOOOOM its like a train wreck, this goes with many areas of our lives, for me its anger I stuff and stuff and then it all comes out at once leaving a wake of damage and more to get angry over .
Whatever we share here someone will relate to, some one will feel our pain and understand and maybe even help us through, I have shared here many things where others have been and it helps to get that feedback from them , empathy lots of empathy around here.
the one time i had tears in my eyes in clean time was the nite the divorce was settled= Imagine being in recovery for nigh on 16 years and have this thing happen,,,a late hit ! So I sat that nite and cried out to God "Why God do you not give my little girl a mother whod be there for her ?" My little one was all of three when my ex left us,,, then one day in school other kids asked her where her mama was . She told me that eveing "Daddy,,, I told them that she left us when I was three" Many times ive felt grieved and guilty tha even in recovery Id do something irresponsible like get married without getting to know her well enough !! At that time I figured that marriage was the only thing lacking in the circle of money,property and prestige,,,i thought that marriage was the socially acceptable thing to do next ,,,, I forgot that the Basic Text says "Social acceptability does not equeal recovery !!!" Im glad I did my Steps on that,,,,im greatful Ive had many recovering people sharing that pain with me,,,and now Im gald and greatful HP has proved that Im a capable dad,,, and now a responsible and productive member of society,,, my kid and I walked thru and away for the hard part,,, now my baby is all of 12(25 September) ,,,, apple of her daddys eye !! Grace of God,Grace of God,Grace of God !!
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!
thers been other griefs too= first a great grand ma died when i just got clean then a fav.cousin died being passed up for Regional Delegate and seeing someone else in that post even though I was elected !!(im afraid to share about this even now,,, for fear that evil will stalk me !!!!) later it was pa,,, in the new millenium then the divorce and payout three years ago gall bladder removal and surgery last year a major crash in my jeep this last month,,, this has left me afraid of the road and financially at a loss !!!and brought in a new resentment !!! So then,,,,am i being humble enough ?
-- Edited by Raman at 15:57, 2007-09-27
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Raman an addict clean and serene just for today in NA Worldwide ; live to love and love to live the NA Way !!!