hope all is well for you's been doing ok i guess. Lots going on in my world kids stuff's, my youngest daughter deciding to come live with me, that hasn't been for five years now, so i drove an houur out of town to get her, had to deal with her school...her dad....her dad...her dad...yikes. and my oldest daughter who apparently didn't approve for fear of another relapse...didn't (doesn't) want my youngest to go through what she did...not that i don't understand that... so she decided to take some control of the situation and created a bit of stress...no a lot of stress! but ya, i allowed it all to stress me. got mad, cooled off, got madder.. so my youngest then decided she missed her friends and her dad too much and 4 days later moved back to dads. o-k i understand, glad that she knows she can come to me if she wants/needs so my oldest in the meantime hasn't been home since last friday, she and her girlfriend have been staying at my friends home. Which is another story all together...My first female friend in i don't know how long, a friend from the program...has put herself smack in the middle of everything in my life. Due to happenings a few weeks ago concerning an out of town round up..i haven't had much to do with her lately. I don't know i could go on and on, bottom line is there;'s lots today i'm really trying hard to put in my higher powers hands but i'm struggling. My oldest seems to think i'm doing things that i did belfore my last relapse, honestly i think thats so far from my reality i don't understand. serious lack of communication going on and i can't get us together to talk. She has decided to move out with her girlfriend, which i don't completely disagree with but would love to see her finish her grade 12 first. she's 18 and has a mind of her own. been talking to my sponsor, going to lots of meetings, praying lots! The reality is this is my relaity, the one i ongoingly escaped from. all i know today for sure is...i'm powerless over drugs and alcohol and my life has become unmanageable...i've lost my desire , Wendy is still unmanageable. Her anger, defensiveness...blah blah blah Gee, what do you mean not everythings is fixed yet, what the heck..
off to a meeting now thanks for letting me share and welcome to the newer newcomers
Wendy your going thru it just keep on trudging and you'll get thru it stronger and wiser. YOur facing things, the past will be used agaisnt you just go foreward think foreward, think things thru turn it over , give it up, let them go if they want to go and welcome them when they want to come back .
Keep doing what your doing surrender when it comes up, HP will take it if you want to give it up.
Keep in touch i'll be praying for you and for strength
