Many of us, whether we are conscious of it or not, create much of the unhappiness we experience. Our disappointments are the result of our own negative or limited thoughts about ourselves and our world. What are some of those limiting thoughts, those subconscious beliefs, which keep us from experiencing joy and wholeness?
One of those beliefs is that we cannot be fulfilled unless we are loved and accepted by those who are the victims of our past experiences, that we are too old or too set in our ways to change. Still another false idea is, "It's a catastrophe if things don't go my way!" Then, too, there's the self-defeating attitude that to love is to lose, so I'd better prepare for the worst to happen because it will.
Two more irrational beliefs are, I have no control over my happiness and I want life to be easy and without hassles; therefore, I'll avoid discomfort or any new commitments.
TODAY I will see each disappointment in my life as a challenge to discover the negative or limited beliefs which keep me from seeing myself as a person of unlimited resources and potential.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Change. It's scary. It's hard. It's needed. Sometimes it feels good; other times it feels bad. But one thing is for sure: it keeps on happening.
Just when our life seems settled, it changes. We can't stop life. We can't stay this age forever. The world changes. Life moves on. There are always new things to do and learn.
Change means we're always beginners in some ways. We need to ask for wisdom and courage. We get it by listening, by praying, by meditating. When we ask, our Higher Power will teach us to be part of good changes.
Higher Power, help me believe that Your plans call for good changes.Today I'll think about the changes in my life. I've lived through a lot. I'll be okay when more changes come, with God's help. I can keep on growing.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Sharing with another our fears of starting a new job, ending a relationship, or even joining a social club will help us keep the fear in perspective. Fears that go undiscussed have a way of growing and overtaking our lives. In time we find that because of our shame about being afraid, we have isolated ourselves from the very people who can help us.
All of us are afraid some of the time. Our fears, however, can be managed if we use the tools found in the fellowship. Sponsors, friends, and meetings are the channels for our release from fear. Naming the fear loosens its hold on us. And equally important, we discover that others understand our fear, for they have experienced something very similar. We are not unique. That knowledge makes it easier to reveal another fear, another time.
Perhaps the best gift I can give another is talking with them about something I fear. Naming the fear will help me. Sharing it will help them because of the bond we will feel.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
So great to have your presence and the presence of all kindred spirits of MIP back in my daily recovery too
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Don't make me have to come to India an hunt you down ( going to be hard wading thru over a billion people but i'll findja ), and you owe me an email I believe
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
It is quite possible to waste a lot of time and energy trying to make impossible changes. Many of us, inspired by the dynamics of the program and driven more by enthusiasm than prudence, strike out on missions that cannot be accomplished -- missions we cannot win and should never undertake.
Turning back the clock is one of these. It can't be done. Controlling someone else's behavior is another. We can set the stage for the desired behavior, encourage it, and improve the odds by getting out of the way, but we don't have it in our bag of tricks to make people think, feel, or do any one thing.
The program addresses the art of the possible. The only options we have are the options that are available to us. If our former partners don't want to reconcile with us, that's not an available option. A happily-ever-after marriage is not possible if we haven't yet learned how to have a healthy relationship. Instead, we can focus on acquiring these people skills by building to our own possibilities.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
Good stuff Tahir. Change is the only thing that will keep me from going back to that cooker. As long as I remain teachable and open-minded there will always be something for me to learn about recovery. Once I start thinking I've got this I'm in big trouble. The steps will set me free and help me change. Sharing with other recovering addicts keeps me grounded. I need to stay enthusiastic and chase my recovery like I chased that bag.
Thanks for sharing that, tvb3. Yeah, the other day I made an online meeting where I had a "A-ha" moment when a member shared this ~ In NA, the more I learn, the more I don't know! Just what you shared too. Just the vigilance and caution I need today in my recovery. No doubt, we are each other's eyes and ears...
Here's something more I read the other day... Hope many would identify with this too...
"Last night I asked for help, but the person couldn't give it to me. Tonight I'm not going to ask because I'll be refused." Poor us! One person has rejected us, so now we've got the whole world rejecting us. We believe if one person lets us down, everyone else will too.
Such thinking, as negative as it is, can provide safety. If we believe we can't trust anymore, then we won't. But there won't be any growth in this kind of safety. By condemning everyone, we won't see those who want to help.
To find help we may have to ask several people. If a few people turn us away, we shouldn't give up hope. There are many flowers in the field of life, but to pick the best, we need to look at them all.
If I get rejected it doesn't mean I'm a bad person or no one can be trusted. It means I need to take another risk or maybe two.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
The Fellowship keeps us grounded in the current moment. We learn to live today. Our planning and scheming and dreaming about tomorrow becomes less time consuming. The idea of living one day at a time makes sense to us. Our Program teaches us that life is not about to happen, it is happening, and each moment is important.
When we concentrated only on the future, we couldn't be happy with today. We thought if we could only get to tomorrow, things would be better. Tomorrow never comes, so we were always trapped in a hopeless situation. Now we live one day at a time, and grow moment by moment.
Recovery is about today and living life in the present. Since I no longer have to manage the universe, I have only myself to worry about today. I can let my Higher Power take care of tomorrow.
__________________
"If we do an honest examination of exactly what we are giving, we are better able to evaluate the results we are getting."Chapter 10 - Emotional Pain - NA Way of Life.
), and you owe me an email I believe
